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Re: ARGH those Suburbans

To: <DOUGLAS_RUSSELL@yr.com>, "MG List" <mgs@autox.team.net>
Subject: Re: ARGH those Suburbans
From: Larry Macy <macy@bblmail.psycha.upenn.edu>
Date: Thu, 14 Oct 1999 14:37:11 -0400
ROGLMAOTIMEPRDML

Larry
(with the loaned 76 B)

At this exact moment in time 10/14/99 13:22, DOUGLAS_RUSSELL@yr.com made 
the profound statement:

>          Are we still talking about Suburbans?  Great, here's my 
>          contribution and I promise not to say anything LBC related.
>          
>          We just gave up our 93 8-passenger station wagon (caprice 
>          classic) for a brand spanking new 9-passenger suburban.  It will 
>          be my wife's (the soccer mom _ and swimming and scouts and 4H and 
>          dance class and endless other activities) daily driver which she 
>          will drive like a car.  She's all of 110lbs and 5-4 and 
>          constantly tailgates while either yelling at the kids or gabbing 
>          on the cell phone so look out for her - she will be the one who 
>          can barely see over the steering wheel.  BTW, I've already put in 
>          brighter headlights and raised the beam ever so much.  I want to 
>          be sure to annoy the hell out of all those lowly sedan drivers.
>          
>          We've done the minivan thing and the Aerostar was great albeit 
>          ugly.  It had 4 wheel drive and plenty of luggage space behind 
>          the 3rd seat.  There was the image problem though- it is next to 
>          impossible to pull up to a traffic light and be cool in a 
>          minivan.  That notwithstanding, there are no minivans currently 
>          available that will accommodate 2 adults, 5 kids and 
>          accoutrements like luggage, bikes and snacks.  Thus, the Suburban 
>          was a good choice.
>          
>          I think someone asked about the psychology of SUV owners.  I feel 
>          qualified to answer.  In my professional opinion tire size and 
>          body lift are inversely related to the male driver's penis size.  
>          Thus, a highly lifted 4x4 with very large exaggerated tires 
>          suggests that the owner has a rather small penis.  The tire size 
>          and body height are symbolic manifestations of the small penis 
>          owners need to compensate for his feelings of inadequacy.  Of 
>          course, factory height and tires suggests that the male driver is 
>          in possession of a normal size penis.  And oh, before you all get 
>          carried away and start driving around on your wheel rims to 
>          impress the ladies - forget it - as this will only suggest that 
>          you are mostly a big dick.
>          
>          And please remember that I am on the digest so if anyone has 
>          already mentioned this, please never mind.
>          
>          Dr. Doug
>          
>          69 C Roadster (ready for some fall cruising)
>          69 B Roadster (on jack stands with no floors)
>          77 B Roadster (out with some type of electrical flu)
>          76 B Roadster (on loan)
>          95 Jeep Wrangler Sahara
>          99 Suburban
>          
>          


Larry B. Macy, Ph.D.
macy@bblmail.psycha.upenn.edu
System Administrator/Manager
Neuropsychiatry Section
Department of Psychiatry
University of Pennsylvania
3400 Spruce St. - 1015 Gates
Philadelphia, PA 19104

 Ask a question and you're a fool for three minutes; do not ask a 
question and you're a fool for the rest of your life. 



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