Dear Consumers:
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2000
-SOUTHERN EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside the South. If
you have recieved one of these editions, you may need help understanding the
commands.
The Southern edition may be recognized by the unique opening screen.It
reads: WINDERS 2000, with a background picture of General Robert E. Lee
superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a standard Dukes of
Hazzard screen saver and a Jack Daniels desktop image.
To avoid confusion, please also note:
-The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
-My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
-Dial up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
-Control Panel is known as the "The Dashboard"
-Hard Drive is referred to as "4 Wheel Drive"
-Floppies are "them little ol plastic disc thangs"
and, instead of an error message, a "garbage bag and roll of duct tape" will
appear on your screen.
FURTHER CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN THE SOUTHERN EDITION:
> > OK . . . . . . . ats aw-right > Cancel . . . . . stopdat >
>Reset . . . . . try er agin > Yes . . . . . . yep > No . . . . .
>. . noop > Find . . . . . . hunt fer it > Go to. . . . . . over
>yonder > Back . . . . . . back yonder > Help . . . . . . hep me out
>here > Stop . . . . . . kwitit > Start . . . . . crank er up >
>Settings . . . . settins > Programs . . ... stuff at duz stuff >
>Documents . . .. stuff ah done did
Also please note that the 2000 SOUTHERN EDITION does not recognize capital
letters or any punctuation marks.
Furthermore, some programs are exclusive to Winders 2000:
> > Tiperiter . . . . . .. A word processing program > colerin book
>. . . . . a graphics program > cyferin mersheen . ....calculator >
>outhouse paper . . ....notepad > iner-net . . . . . . . Microsoft
>Explorer 4.0 > pichers . . . . . . . .A graphics viewer
We regret any inconvenience we'uns may have caused you'all if you received a
copy of the SOUTHERN EDITION. Iffen ya'llll cain't get aholt offit too gud,
ya'alll may return it to Micra soft fer a replacement.
sorry fer anny in-con-veeenyence, I hope this helps y'all!
BillyBob Gates
_________________________________________________________________
///
/// land-speed@autox.team.net mailing list
///
|