Some of you will recall the i spent last weekend detailing a spit**re for
a friend so he could drive away from his wedding in it.
During last week i spent about six more hours on it fully cleaning the
interior,doing a quick fix on the worn carpets with some vinyl spray,
another buff on the chrome and finally making a "just married" sign in 3
colours suitably tailored to fit on the boot.
Despite being a Tri**ph the car looked beautiful and come saturday
morning i fired it up and prepared to set off for the auspicious nuptuals
(i say auspicious since they were in Rye NY - a very "grarnd piarno" sort
of town and the reception was at westchester country club which costs
more to join than a good house in most places!!)
My wife decided to drive the spit**re rather than my GT and off we went.I
kept checking that she was behind me as i had the directions however
whilst passing Stamford CT i looked behind.....nothing....i checked the
lanes and slowed down, .....nothing
so i went to the next exit and backtracked to see if the "obvious" had
occured- no sign so i turned around and tried three off-ramps in turn,
no wife, no spit**re,(and incidentally no morning-suit jacket, wallet or
spare cigs - all in her car!!)
Not finding anything i figured i had just missed her and that we'd meet
up at the chuch, she had the name if not the directions so i went on and
arrived just before the bride....no wife, no spit**re, no jacket, wallet
or cigs.......oops.........
Now i ask you, what does one do?? I knew she was lost somewhere but i
knew the car wasnt splatted all over the road so i called my daughter at
home and told her that her mother would likely phone and to get my wife
to tell her where she was so i could get her after the ceremony figuring
that itd be rude not to stay for the church bit......wrong choice as i
discovered.
The nuptuals were performed and i fled the church and called home - she
had called. was broken down behind a traffic barrier in stamford and
"WHERE THE F**CK WAS I..."
The GT will do 90....it did....and after a bit of searching i found all
the lost articles behind a construction barrier which is why i missed it
earlier....all were in good condition except the wife was ....shall we
say, less than blissfuly happy having spent nearly 2 hours in the blazing
sun. I was planning how to move all my belongings and 3 cars into my
office without actually being killed.
The first part of the reception was a little chilly but as the story got
recounted a few times a shred of humour filtered in.
The married couple left the reception in a pors**e boxter hurredly loaned
and they did get to use my sign. The spit**re is pulled off the road
until i can get it tomorrow .
The sad part is that i have 20-24 hours into someone elses shi**y car
that will never be used for th purpose intended (I told the bastard to
buy an MG) and i will have to smoothe talk the wife into the trip to
maine in two weeks since all MY cars are now lumped in with the spi***re
- and we all know the world of difference in reliability dont we!!
mike robson
69 roadster
70 BGT
72 roadster
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