I had heard about this letter indirectly, but have recently come
across a reprint. Enjoy it! This is probably the most politically
incorrect stuff since the crumpet catching banter!
[Warning to humour impaired - do not read!]
[Warning to those easily offended - do not read!]
[ulix: i have taken great care to capitalise all my sentences so that
you won't be further offended. :-)]
A Sprite's Shortcomings;
letters from readers
Motor Sport, April 1961
Sir,
I first discovered that girls like sports cars. Secondly, that
an Austin Healey Sprite was the best I could afford. There is no
doubt in their little minds when I offer its services to run them
home.
With safety harness that I neglect to explain the release of,
and door handles that only an expert can find, a hard-top securely in
place, I look set for a good hour or so. But no! What a design! It
must be the most anti-necking car in existence. The transmission
tunnel is the most formidable obstacle, even if she's willing. I don't
think I should mention the position of the handbrake. I ask you? What
good is performance, road-holding, etc., if you're up against it when
you get there? And with windows ready to steam up there is always the
danger of the lurking Law. You spend a whole evening chatting to some
female, all to no avail.
Sometimes I think I am getting too old for it all. Any
suggestions?
I am, Yours, etc,
"Pierre" (23 Years old),
London.
[These shortcomings of the Sprite we have not encountered, having
reached the age when girls do not encourage us to run them home in
sports cars. The best car for a pick-up is of more interest and one
day we may expound on its special requirements. But it is nice to
hear both sides of an argument, so perhaps girls who ride in sports
cars will tell us whether or not they share this correspondent's
opinion of the Sprite. After which we turn him over to "Auntie May",
who writes: "Are you sure Pierre, that girls accept lifts in your
sports car because of your charm or merely because they are aware of
the safety factors? Try to forget the safety harness and floor gear
lever. Then you can be sure of a young lady's true love and affection.
You will want a little flat as well as a little sports car, and I wish
you both every happiness" - ED]
_______________________________________________________________________
Mike Gigante
3D interactive graphics, Virtual Reality, british sports cars, and wine
http://mega.cgl.rmit.edu.au/~mg/ mg@mega.cgl.rmit.edu.au
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