Guy is late for work. Driving too fast over a bridge, he see a cop car but
is too late to slow down before the speed gun gets him.
"Going a little bit fast, weren't you sir?" says the cop.
"Sorry, officer, but I'm late for work"
"What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher"
"WHAAAAAAT???? Never heard that one before. What does it entail?"
"Well, first I insert a shoe horn and gradually wind it out until the anus
is about 6 inches from top edge to bottom edge, then I use a modified
G-clamp to wind it out to 3 feet over a period of a few days and then
finally I use an electric winch to stretch it to 6 1/2 feet over a week"
"Weird!" says the cop. "What do you do with a 6 1/2 foot arsehole?"
"Well, you stick it on a blind bend by a bridge and give it a speed gun"
----- Original Message -----
From Eddie Sheffield <esheffield at prizmail.com>
To: Spridgets <spridgets@autox.team.net>; MG List <mgs@autox.team.net>
Sent: 11 July 2001 20:20
Subject: Humor - no LBC
> Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a
> State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks
> to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns
> on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices
> that there are five old ladies - two in the front seat and three in the
> back - wide eyed and white as ghosts.
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