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>> >> If Operating Systems were Beers
>> >>
>> >> DOS Beer
>> >> Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to read the
>> >> directions carefully before opening the can.
>> >> Originally only came in an 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can.
>> >> However, the can is divided into 8 compartments of 2 oz. each, which
>> >> have to be consumed separately. Although soon to be
>> >discontinued, a lot
>> >> of people are going to keep drinking it after it's no longer
>> >available.
>> >>
>> >> Mac Beer
>> >> At first, came only in a 16-oz. can, but now comes in a 32-oz. can.
>> >> Considered by many to be a "light" beer. All the cans look identical.
>> >> When you take one from the fridge, it opens itself. The
>> >ingredients list
>> >> is not on the can. If you call the brewery to ask about the
>> >> ingredients, you are told that "you don't need to know." A
>> >notice on the
>> >> side reminds you to drag your empties to the trash can.
>> >>
>> >> Windows 3.1 Beer
>> >> The world's most popular. Comes in a 16-oz. can that looks a lot like
>> >> Mac Beer's. Requires that you already own DOS Beer. Claims that it
>> >> allows you to drink several DOS Beers simultaneously, but in
>> >reality you
>> >> can only drink a few of them, very slowly. Especially slow if you are
>> >> drinking the Windows Beer at the same time. Sometimes, for
>> >apparently no
>> >> reason, a can of Windows Beer will explode when you open it.
>> >>
>> >> OS/2 Beer
>> >> Comes in a 32-oz can. Does allow you to drink several DOS Beers
>> >> simultaneously. Allows you to drink Windows 3.1 Beer
>> >simultaneously too,
>> >> but somewhat slower. Advertises that its cans won't explode when you
>> >> open them, even if you shake them up first. You never really
>> >see anyone
>> >> drinking OS/2 Beer, but the manufacturer (International Beer
>> >> Manufacturing) claims that 9 million six-packs have been sold.
>> >>
>> >> Windows 95 Beer
>> >> No one drinks it much yet, but a lot of people have
>> >taste-tested it and
>> >> claim it's wonderful. The can looks a lot like Mac Beer's can, but
>> >> tastes more like Windows 3.1 Beer. It comes in 32-oz. cans,
>> >but when you
>> >> look inside, the cans only have 16 oz. of beer in them. Most
>> >people will
>> >> probably keep drinking Windows 3.1 Beer until their friends
>> >try Windows
>> >> 95 Beer and say they like it. The ingredients list, when you
>> >look at the
>> >> small print, has some of the same ingredients that come in DOS beer,
>> >> even though the manufacturer claims that this is an entirely
>> >new brew.
>> >>
>> >> Windows NT Beer
>> >> Comes in 32-oz. cans, but you can only buy it by the truckload. This
>> >> causes most people to have to go out and buy bigger
>> >refrigerators. The
>> >> can looks just like Windows 3.1 Beer's, but the company promises to
>> >> change the can to look just like Windows 95 Beer's - after Windows 95
>> >> Beer starts shipping. Touted as an "industrial strength" beer, and
>> >> suggested only for use in bars.
>> >>
>> >> UNIX Beer
>> >> Comes in several different brands, in cans ranging from 8
>> >oz. to 64 oz.
>> >> Drinkers of UNIX Beer display fierce brand loyalty, even though they
>> >> claim that all the different brands taste almost identical. Sometimes
>> >> the pop-tops break off when you try to open them, so you have to have
>> >> your own can opener around for those occasions, in which case you
>> >> either need a complete set of instructions or a friend who has been
>> >> drinking UNIX Beer for several years.
>>
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