_____
Subject: Obituary
From: "Don Torres" <turtletorres@aol.com>
To: "Don Torres" <turtletorres@aol.com>
Subject: Obituary
Date: Wed, 14 Feb 2007 18:17:35 -0500
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>Obituary of the late Mr Common Sense
>
>Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
>has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was,
>since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
>He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
>Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the
>worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
>
>Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
>more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children,
>are in charge).
>
>His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
>overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 -year- old
>boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens
>suspended from school for u sing mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher
>fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
>
>Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
>job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
>children. It declined even further when schools were required to get
>parental consent to administer Tylenol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a
>student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant
>and wanted to have an abortion.
>
>Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became
>contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
>treatment than their victims.
>
>Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
>burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
>
>Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed
>to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot spilled it in her lap
>and was awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death
>by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter,
>Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
>
>He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else
>Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
>
>Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If
>you still remember him, pass this on.
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