I had to share this with all of you.
Larry
Subject: HUMOR: MORE ACTUAL LABELS
>
> In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
> stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods. I
am
> sure I have seen some of these but a few were new.....
>
> On Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." (Gee, that's the only
> time I have to work on my hair.)
>
> On a bag of Fritos: "You could be winner! No purchase necessary.
> Details inside." (The shoplifter special.)
>
> On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that
> would be how . . .?)
>
> On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But
> it's "just" a suggestion.)
>
> On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box): "Do not turn
> upside down." (Too late, asshole!)
>
> On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
> (As night follows the day . . )
>
> On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But
> wouldn't this save more time?)
>
> On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
> machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce
> the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds
> with head-colds off those forklifts.)
>
> On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One can only
> hope.)
>
> On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
> (As opposed to what?)
>
> On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I
> gotta admit, I'm curious.)
>
> On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Really? No shit?)
>
> On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat
> nuts." (Step 3: Fly Delta.)
>
> On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable
> you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame parents for this one.)
>
> On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
> genitals." (How???!!!!......Why????!!!!! Did someone
> actually...well...you
> know....uh???)
>
>
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