I know this is non tiger but being that I am in the navy I find this
amusing!
Chris in Hawaii
-----Original Message-----
From: Michael-Skyla <micsky@hawaii.rr.com>
To: Mathew <sgtmakay@hotmail.com>; Chris Vaught <CVaught@Hawaii.rr.com>;
ClaysJill <ClaysJill@aol.com>; Matt Pavelko <MJPavelko@Hawaii.rr.com>
Date: Sunday, April 30, 2000 6:11 PM
Subject: You guys will definetly want to read this--had us laughing hard!!
>You guys will like this!
>
> McDonald's vs Navy
>Reasons why McDonald's is better than the Navy
>
> 1. If you have to take a piss, you can go take a piss. No
> questions asked.
>
>2. You'll never have to go port and starboard on the fryer.
>
>3. Better pay.
>
>4. The boxes of food at McDonald's aren't stamped "Rejected
>by Hardee's" or "Not fit for human consumption".
>
>5. The ability to call in sick.
>
>6. The ability to quit.
>
>7. McDonald's doesn't get their uniforms from the same
>company as the state penitentiary.
>
>8. McDonald's doesn't deploy.
>
>9. They have actual janitors.
>
>10. No McDrills.
>
>11. The grill breaks, you CALL someone to fix it.
>
>12. At least your boss accepts that he's a clown.
>
>13. One word: overtime.
>
>14. At McDonald's, you will never, EVER, worry about being
> put in prison for ten years because you told your wife what the secret
>sauce is.
>
>15. They pay you for training.
>
>16. You'll never die a horrible, excruciating death from the
>crush depth implosion of a McDonald's.
>
>17. No steam piping.
>
>18. No time at McDonald's will you hear your boss give a
>thirty minute dissertation over the P.A. on the importance of being at the
>register 15 minutes early.
>
>19. They won't ask you about Taco Bell operations on the
>advancement test.
>
>20. You get to leave work at the end of EVERY day
>
>21. McDonald's will eventually fire the really stupid
> employees.
>
>22. Two words: Happy Meals.
>
>23. NO WATCHES
>
>24. McDonald's has a slide out back.
>
>25. To do something at McDonald's, you look at the color
> coded chart,not OP umpty-squat, chapter whatever, reference 3, ACN B, rev
>17.
>
>26. If McDonald's catches fire, you LEAVE.
>
>27. No Fod Walkdown
>
>28. Leaving McDonald's in an emergency doesn't require a
> EEBD and a lot of praying.
>
>29. The coffee's better.
>
>30. Someone else makes the water.
>
>31. You don't have to live there to work there.
>
>32. Their TV commercials are a lot cooler.
>
>33. Stock in McDonald's is worth something. The Nav is a
> part of an operation that is 6 trillion dollars in the hole.
>
>34. Special sauce isn't "hand made".
>
>35. Opening for business doesn't require a full day of
>preparations and everyone to show up for a brief at 0230.
>
>36. Personnel inspection requirements are written on the
> door. (No shirt, no shoes, no service)
>
>37. At McDonald's, dislocating your shoulder is not
>considered getting the good deal.
>
>38. Because you deserve a break today.
>
>39. Even the little Hamburglar is cooler than a goat.
>
>40. Mayor McCheese doesn't wield a righteous thumb of
> indignation.
>
>41. You can choose which McDonald's you want to work at.
>
>42. If you want to buy your boss a beer, that's okay.
>
>43. If you want to tell your boss to fuck off and just die
>fucking die, that's okay too.
>
>44. There is no Uniform Code of McDonald's Justice to deal
> with.
>
>45. No one will wake at 2 in the morning to start the grill.
>
>46. Chances of you getting called back after you get off
>work are pretty damn slim.
>
>47. Putting the pickle on the hamburger doesn't require a QA
>and a signature to be used against you in a court of law, should they
>want you.
>
>48. How many McDonald's were sunk in W.W.II?
>
>49. $2.99 is a meal price, not a daily wage at McDonald's.
>
>50. You don't have to go single register operations if
> someone spills a Coke.
>
>51. McDonald's doesn't require a 24 hour Shutdown Register
>Operator and McRoving Watch.
>
>52. McDonald's doesn't call your house at 5:30 in the
>morning blaring some god-awful antiquated song about a bugler just to wake
>you up.
>
>53. No McRadcon.
>
>54. At McDonald's, your boss will never make you drive him
>around for two and a half months so he can spy on Wendy's.
>
>55. You don't have to come in to work at 7:00 only to wait
>around for an hour waiting for your boss to tell you things you already
>know.
>
>56. No McGMT.
>
>57. If you burn a hamburger they won't take away half a
> month's pay for two months and restrict you to the playground.
>
>58. Knowledge of the material of construction and variable
>operating characteristics of the grill are not prerequisites for operation.
>
>59. You don't have to take apart the shake machine once a
>quarter just because.
>
>60. you don't have to shave off your goatee
>
>61. At McDonald's, when the toilet clogs, you don't rig
> pressurized air to the shitter.
>
>62. You scrub the floors because it's dirty, not because
>it's Wednesday.
>
>63. There is almost always plenty of parking. If not, drive
>through.
>
>64. Don't like what you got? Take it back.
>
>65. No 16 hour days at McDonald's prototype making burgers
>in the middle of the desert for no one.
>
>66. If you wipe up a catsup spill at McDonald's, you don't
> have to let it dry before you throw it away.
>
>67. You don't have to have permission from the Manager,
>Assistant Manager, and Register Operator before going into the freezer.
>
>68. You don't have to completely undress to pinch a loaf.
>
>69. ALL of the articles of the Constitution apply to you at
>McDonald's.
>
>70. It's called "Happy Meal", not "Happy Hour".
>
>
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