Racing season must be coming - from The Onion, perhaps
tuning up for Thicko Village?:
GAINESVILLE, FLAfter 10 months of bitter,
around-the-clock struggle, pizza-delivery driver and
aspiring guitarist Darren Lowell, 23, has finally
mastered The Rolling Stones' "Jumpin' Jack Flash," his
upstairs neighbor reported Tuesday. "I'm glad he
finally nailed it," neighbor Jeremy Quinlan said.
"From what I could hear through my living-room floor
these past 10 months, he was really locked in an epic
battle with that elusive 'dunh-dunh, da-da-da da-da-da
da-da-da' riff. It was truly like Ahab and the whale."
Next week, Lowell is slated to embark on his next
ambitious project, Van Halen's "Eruption," which is
scheduled for completion in the spring of 2004.
Grasshopper
=====
"The Truth? As you want to hear it? I can't do that. You couldn't afford me."
- Keith Moon
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