There are, of course, other verses for other biblical figurines. E.g.,
Got myself a sweet Madonna,
Dressed in rhinestones, sittin' on
A pedestal of abalone shells.
Comes in colors pink and pleasant,
Glows in the dark 'cause she's iridescent,
Take her with you when you travel far.
(My favorite - how often do you get to slip the word "iridescent" into a
song?)
And:
I don't care if it bumps or jostles,
Long as I got the Twelve Apostles,
Bolted to the dashboard of my car.
Don't I have a pious mess,
Such a crowd of holiness,
Strung across the dashboard of my car.
And, finally:
When I'm goin' fornicatin',
I got my ceramic Satan,
Sinnin' on the dashboard of my motor home.
The women know I'm on the level,
Thanks to the wild-eyed stoneware devil,
Ridin' on the dashboard of my . . .
Sneerin' from the dashboard of my . . .
Leerin' from the dashboard of my . . . car.
What a tragedy for good wholesome music when dashboard figurines fell out of
favor - spurred on, no doubt, by the demise of the metal dashboard and the
de-commissioning of St. Christopher. Replaced, unfortunately, by the
infamous "Baby on Board" signs and stuffed animals with Velcro feet.
Jim Hill
Goin' 90, it ain't scary,
Long as I got the Virgin Mary . . . &etc
> -----Original Message-----
> From: craig bielat [SMTP:thickosehaskel@email.msn.com]
> Sent: Tuesday, March 06, 2001 6:21 AM
> To: team-thicko@autox.team.net
> Subject: Plastic Jesus
>
> Here's the Lyrics Bill,
>
> Well, I do'nt care if it rains or freezes/ Long as I have Plastic Jesus/
> Riding on the dashboard of my car / Through all trials and tribulations' /
> and
> my travels through the nation, / with my Plastic Jesus I'll go far.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car / I'm
> afaraid
> he'll have to go, / His magnet's ruining my raido, / and if I have a wreck
> He'll leave a scar.
>
> Riding down the thoroughfare, / with He's nose up in the air, / a wreck
> may be
> ahead, but he do'nt mind, / Trouble coming, He do'nt see / 'cause He's got
> His
> eyes on me / and any other thing that lies behind.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car / Though
> the
> sun shines on his back / Makes Him peel and crack / a little patching
> keeps
> Him up to par.
>
> When pedastrians try to cross / I let them know whose boss / I never blow
> the
> horn or give them warning / I ride all over town / Trying to run 'em down
> /
> It's seldom that they live to see the morning.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car His halo
> fits just right / I use it for a sight / They'll scatter or they'll
> splatter
> near and far.
>
> When I'm in a traffic jam / He do'nt care if I say damn / I can let all
> sort
> of cuses rool / Plastic Jesus dosen't hear / for He has a plastic ear /
> the
> man who invented plastic saved my soul.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car / Once
> His
> robe was snowey white / now it is'nt quite so bright / Stained by the
> smoke
> from my cigar.
>
> If I weave around at night / And the police think I'm tight / They'll
> never
> find the bottle though they ask / Plastic Jesus shelters me / For His Head
> comes off you see / He's hollow, and I use Him for a flask.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car / Ride
> with
> me and have a dram / Of the blood of the Lamb / Plastic Jesus is a Holy
> bar.
>
> Well, I do'nt care if it rains or freezes/ Long as I have Plastic Jesus/
> Riding on the dashboard of my car / Through all trials and tribulations' /
> and
> my travels through the nation, / with my Plastic Jesus I'll go far.
>
> Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus / riding on the dashboard of my car / I'm
> afaraid
> he'll have to go, / His magnet's ruining my raido, / and if I have a wreck
> He'll leave a scar.
>
> Can't wait to here it this summer! Eddie Haskel
///
/// team-thicko@autox.team.net mailing list
///
|