This may help!
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Beer; For a Better World
Date: Sat, 15 Apr 2000 10:22:03 +1000
From: "Kevin McGuire" <kbm@onaustralia.com.au>
To: "Mike Rosen" <mikerosen@home.com>
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder."
> --Anonymous bumper sticker
>
> Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed.
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and
all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be
out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It
is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be
selfish and worry about my liver."
>--Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy
>
>
> I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the
morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
> --Frank Sinatra
>
>
> The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're
sober.
> --William Butler Yeats
>
>
> An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with
his fools.
> --Ernest Hemingway
>
>
> Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to
keep your mouth shut.
> --Ernest Hemingway
>
>
> Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
> --Catherine Zandonella
>
>
> Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying
himself a pleasure.
> --Ambrose Bierce
>
>
> Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
> --Anonymous
>
>
> Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that
truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat, hairy girls.
> -- Ross Levy
>
>
> A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank
her.
> --W.C. Fields
>
>
> What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
> --W.C. Fields
>
> When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
> --Henny Youngman
>
>
> Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all
of the time and have the time of your life.
> -- Michelle Mastrolacasa
>
>
> I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
> --Tom Waits
>
>
> 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
> --Stephen Wright
>
>
> When we drink, we get drunk.
> When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
> When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
> When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
> Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
>
> -- Brian O'Rourke
>
>
> You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline.
It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear
weapons,
but at the very least you need a beer.
>
> --Frank Zappa
>
> Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol
has taken out of me.
>
> --Winston Churchill
>
>
> Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
> --Benjamin Franklin
>
>
> If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it
makes beer shoot out your nose.
>
> --Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy
>
>
> Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the
wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
>
> --Dave Barry
>
>
> The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
>
> --Humphrey Bogart
>
>
> Why is American beer served cold?
> So you can distinguish it from urine.
>
> --David Moulton
>
>
> Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
>
> --Kaiser Wilhelm
>
>
> I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet, tasty beer.
>
> --Homer Simpson
>
>
> Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and
oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient
in beer.
>
> --Dave Barry
>
>
> All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's
just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.
>
> --Homer Simpson
>
>
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