> Many online computer users engage in what is affectionately known as
> "cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into keyboards and shared
through
> Internet phone lines get pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see
below,
> one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online
> chat doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex.
>
> Then again, maybe he does...
>
> Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
>
> Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high
heels.
> I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are
> 36-24-36. What do you look like?
>
> Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on
a
> pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a
> T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it
smells
> funny.
>
> Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
>
> Wellhung: OK
>
> Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the
> stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into
> your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and
> begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
>
> Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
>
> Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
>
> Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk
slides
> off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
>
> Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a
> hole in your blouse. I'm sorry.
>
> Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
>
> Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
>
> Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My
soft
> breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
>
> Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's
stuck.
> Do you have any scissors?
>
> Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly. I'm reaching back
> undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my
> breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
>
> Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting
> the clasp.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your
> tongue all over me.
>
> Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know,
> breasts. They're neat!
>
> Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm
nibbling
> your ear.
>
> Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and
> phlegm.
>
> Sweetheart: What?
>
> Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of
> my blouse.
>
> Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with
a
> plop.
>
> Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your
> hard tool.
>
> Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
>
> Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
>
> Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over,
> in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
>
> Sweetheart: What's the matter?
>
> Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
>
> Sweetheart: Are you OK?
>
> Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
>
> Sweetheart: Can I help?
>
> Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling
> through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
>
> Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
>
> Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. there, that's better.
>
> Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
>
> Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
>
> Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the
cabinet.
> And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost.
> Where's the bedroom?
>
> Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
>
> Wellhung: I found it.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so
> badly.
>
> Wellhung: Me too.
>
> Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked
> bodies pressing each other.
>
> Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
>
> Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
>
> Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the
> glasses on the night table.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
>
> Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room
> and toward the bathroom.
>
> Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
>
> Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for
> the toilet. I lift the lid.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
>
> Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle,
but
> I can't find it. Uh-oh!
>
> Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
>
> Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper.
Sorry
> again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
>
> Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
>
> Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in
> your...you know...woman's thing.
>
> Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
>
> Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss
> your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand
> it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
>
> Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
>
> Sweetheart: What?
>
> Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look
on
> my face.
>
> Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all
> floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
>
> Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my
> underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
>
> Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night
table.
> I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray,
picture
> frames and your candles.
>
> Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
>
> Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One
of
> our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm
pointing
> at it, a shocked look on my face.
>
> Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
>
> Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
>
> Sweetheart: [logged off]
--
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