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A serious use for one of our favorite Sprite accessories. . . Sorry List

To: spridgets@Autox.Team.Net
Subject: A serious use for one of our favorite Sprite accessories. . . Sorry List! ..... NO LBC Content
From: George Procyshyn <geopro@cyberdrive.net>
Date: Fri, 06 Nov 1998 01:31:50 -0500
References: <199811060458.VAA25111@newhumor.com>
Reply-to: George Procyshyn <geopro@cyberdrive.net>
Sender: owner-spridgets@Autox.Team.Net
If you drop a buttered piece of bread, it will fall on the
 floor butter-side down.  If a cat is dropped from a window
 or other high and towering place, it will land on it's feet.
 
 But what if you attach a buttered piece of bread, butter side
 up to a cat's back and toss them both out the window?  Will
 the cat land on it's feet?  Or will the butter side splat on the
 ground?
 
 Even if you are too lazy to do the experiment yourself you
 should be able to deduce the obvious result.  The laws of
 butterology demand that the butter must hit the ground,
 and the equally strict laws of feline aerodynamics demand
 that the cat can not smash it's furry back. If the combined
 construct were to land, nature would have no way to
 resolve this paradox.  Therefore, it simply does not fall.
 
 That's right, you have discovered the secret of antigravity!
 A buttered cat will, when released, quickly move to a height
 where the forces of cat-twisting and butter repulsion are in
 equilibrium.  This equilibrium point can be modified by
 scraping off some of the butter, providing lift, or removing
 some of the cat's limbs, allowing descent.
 
 Most of the civilized species of the Universe already use this
 principle to drive their ships while within a planetary system.
 The loud humming heard by most sighters of UFO's is,
 in fact, the purring of several hundred tabbies.
 
 





 This joke was originally part of an OMNI Magazine during
 or prior to 1993.

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