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Weather Humor

To: Morgans@autox.team.net
Subject: Weather Humor
From: Ben Palmer <palsy@bellatlantic.net>
Date: Fri, 22 Jan 1999 22:06:15 -0500
A Little Weather Humor.....

 60 degrees - Californians put their sweaters on.
 50 degrees - Miami residents turn on the heat.
 45 degrees - Vermont residents go to outdoor concert.
 40 degrees - You can see your breath
        Californians shiver uncontrollably
         Minnesotans go swimming. 
          Lucas electric malfunction. 
 35 degrees - Italian cars don't start.
 32 degrees - Water freezes.
 30 degrees - You plan your vacation in Australia.
 25 degrees - Ohio water freezes
        Californians weep pitiably
        Minnesotans eat ice cream
        Canadians go swimming.
 20 degrees - Politicians begin to talk about the homeless
        New York City water  freezes
        Miami residents plan vacation farther south.
 15 degrees - French cars don't start
        cat insists on sleeping in your bed with  you.
 10 degrees - You need jumper cables to get the car going.
  5 degrees - American cars don't start.
  0 degrees - Alaskans put on T-shirts.
 -10 degrees - German cars don't start
        eyes freeze shut when you step outside.
 -15 degrees - You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo
         Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects
        Miami residents cease to exist.
 -20 degrees - Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you
        politicians actually do something about the homeless
        Minnesotans shovel snow off roof
        Japanese cars don't start.
 -25 degrees - Too cold to think
        you need jumper cables to get  the driver  going.
 -30 degrees - You plan a two week hot bath
        Swedish cars don't start.
 -40 degrees - Californians disappear
        Minnesotans button top button
        Canadians  put on sweater
        your car helps you plan your trip South.
 -50 degrees - Congressional hot air freezes
        Alaskans close the bathroom window.
 -80 degrees - Polar bears move South
        Green Bay Packer  fans order hot cocoa at the game.
 -90 degrees - Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.
-100 degrees - Hell freezes over
        Clinton finally tells all.

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