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READ!! Very Funny!

To: mgs@Autox.Team.Net
Subject: READ!! Very Funny!
From: Benjamin Ruset <bruset@monmouth.com>
Date: Sat, 15 Nov 1997 00:46:21 -0500
Sorry for the wasted bandwidth, but considering the latest uproar over love
& relationships, and the fact that we're all computer users, i thought that
this would be appropriate:

>Software alert 
>  
>Last year a friend of mine upgraded from GirlFriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 
>and found that it's a memory hog, leaving very little system resources 
>available for other applications. 
>  
>He is now noticing that Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child Processes 
>which are further consuming valuable resources. 
>  
>No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product 
>brochure or the documentation, though other users have informed him 
>that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application. Not 
>only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it is always launched at 
>system initialization, where it can monitor all other system activity. 
> He's finding that some applications such as PokerNight 10.3, BeerBash 
> 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, 
> crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked 
> fine before). During installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as to 
> the installation of undesired Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8 and 
>  BrotherInLaw Beta release. Also, system performance seems to diminish
>with each 
>  passing day. 
>  
>  Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming wife 2.0. 
>  - - - - A "Don't remind me again" button 
>  - - - - Minimize button 
>  - - - - An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 be installed 
>  with the option to uninstall at anytime 
>  without the loss of cache and other system resources. 
>  - - - - An option to run the network driver in promiscuous mode, 
>  which would allow the systems hardware probe feature to be 
> much more useful. 
>  
>  I myself decided to avoid the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by 
>  sticking with Girlfriend 2.0. Even here, however, I found many
>problems. 
>  
>  Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 2.0 on top of Girlfriend 
>  1.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 1.0 first. Other users say this is
>a 
>  long standing bug that I should have known about. Apparently the
>versions 
> of  Girlfriend have conflicts over shared use of the I/O port. You'd 
>  think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by now. To make matters 
>  worse, the uninstall program for Girlfriend 1.0 doesn't work very
>well, 
>  leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. 
>  
>  Another thing -- all versions of Girlfriend continually pop up 
>  little annoying messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0 
>  
>  ***** BUG WARNING ******** 
>  Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 
>  before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files 
>  before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will refuse to 
>  install, claiming insufficient resources. 
>  
>  ***** BUG WORK-AROUNDS ******** 
>  To avoid this bug, try installing Mistress 1.1 on a different system 
>  and never run any file transfer applications such as Laplink 6.0. 
> Also, beware of similar shareware applications that have been known to 
>  carry viruses that may affect Wife 1.0. 
>  
>  Another solution would be to run Mistress 1.0 via a UseNet provider 
>  under an anonymous name. Here again, beware of the viruses which 
>  can accidently be downloaded from the UseNet. 
>    
>  Hope this is enlightning... Andre
>
>
>
BEN RUSET 
-----------------------------------------------------
78 MGB Roadster (has seen better days)
89 Mercury Cougar (Ghetto Cruiser)
-----------------------------------------------------
Homepage - http://www.monomouth.com/~bruset
Saftey Fast! - http://www.infi-pos.com/~oasis
^^^ Note: Under construction, and taking submissions!

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