mgs
[Top] [All Lists]

Re: Damn Cats!....and hogs!....and deer!!!

To: TUSLER%MP050@MPA15AB.MV.UNISYS.COM
Subject: Re: Damn Cats!....and hogs!....and deer!!!
From: "Christopher M. Delling" <cdelling@ic.net>
Date: Tue, 22 Oct 1996 08:14:12 -0400
TUSLER%MP050@MPA15AB.MV.UNISYS.COM wrote:
> 
> >Maybe you should try those high pitched reeds, that only animals
>  can hear (?), and attach them to your front bumper. Do these things
> <really work?
> 
>  Of course they do!  The company has made a FORTUNE selling those things!
> There's one born every minute, you know....
> 
>   *Oh*  Did you mean "Do they work on the DEER?"!  Well, yes.  But first
> you have to spend some time training the deer to recognize that if they
> hear something that the driver doesn't, that's a signal to exit the
> roadway.  First you capture all the deer in the area.  Then you put each
> one in the roadway.  Then you have a friend drive down at high speed
> with those little whistles attached to the fender.  When you hear him
> coming, toss some deer food (Ding-dongs and Ho-Hos work, but don't let
> the environmentalists catch you addicting deer to junk food) off to the
> side, luring the deer off the road.  If that doesn't work, open a jar of
> Kim Chee.  This is riskier.  Although it is guaranteed to drive off every
> deer within miles, it will also draw every bear within miles, who will
> then try to get the jar away from you to put the lid back on.
>   Of course, the only problem with this process is that you cannot hear
> the whistles welded to the bumper, and will get run over waiting for
> your friend. This will upset the deer so much that they will learn to avoid
> whistles no one can hear.  Of course, the bears will learn to come
> running....
> ************************************************************************> 
>*Philippe Tusler - Mission Viejo, CA     | "MILOU"    '57 MGA Roadster *
> *A-Mail:   <TUSLER@MP050>                | "TINTIN"   '66 MG/MGB-GT    *
> *InterNet: TUSLER@MP050.MV.unisys.com    | "N/A"      '88 ISUZU Trooper*
> ************************************************************************
Just wanted to say thanks for the sanity check here - best laugh I've 
had in weeks.

<Prev in Thread] Current Thread [Next in Thread>