OUCH! Southerners are taking quite a beating here. First you call us
"Yanks", which after some explanation Bubba's gonna figger out that
that's short for Yankee. The next thing you'll see is about a
quarter-ounce of Redman heading for your eye that will hide the sixteen
ounce fist following close behind. Redman is "chaw" or chewing tobacco
for you furriners and Yankees (one and the same, to Texans) in the
audience.
Then y'all 'cuse us of drivin' badly! Or least ways worsin' those
chowder heads up north of the Mason-Dixon line. Well, I'm here to tell
y'all that I've LIVED up north
and theys no better 'un us when it comes to takin' the ol' red pickemup
truck and cuttin' off one of them Yuppie types in his BMW.
Seriously, I just moved back to Texas from Chicago and believe me,
people drive poorly all over. I think some of it has to do with the
poor training received by new drivers. Having lived in England in my
(misspent) youth, I know that there you actually have to learn how to
DRIVE to get a license. Here you only have to learn how to AIM and,
combined with automatic transmissions and brain-deadening superhighways,
no one really participates in driving the car. Also, common to both
Chicago and Houston, I've found that a LOT
of the bad drivers on the roads are immigrants from third world
countries. Not to join in any immigrant bashing or racism, but it is
true that they are often driving autos in poor physical condition, due
to their economic status, and with little concern for those around them,
possibly due to driving habits (or lack thereof) they brought with them
from their home
countries.
BTW, in twenty years of driving in this country, I have never had an
accident. Knock, Knock! (me knocking on fake wood veneer of my computer
table).
LBC Content: I ain't never had no accidents with my MGA, neither!
David Littlefield
Houston, TX
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