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deep philosophical questions

To: mgs@autox.team.net
Subject: deep philosophical questions
From: wzehring@cmb.biosci.wayne.edu (Will Zehring)
Date: Tue, 30 Apr 1996 08:50:53 -0400
Fellow fiends:

Okay, I have some very important questions to ask.  This all has to do with 
the process of restoration.  It is well known that the effort put into a 
restoration approaches 100% asymptotically (long standing members of 
"british-cars" will recognize this as either Fisher's Law or as Wakeman's 
Law).  That is, you get half the restoration done in the first time period, 
a quarter done in the next time period, an eight done in the next time 
period, etc. until the car arrives at the condition of safely "drivable" and 
then the final bits and pieces *never* actually get taken care of.  
Economists believe the root cause of this phenomenon is spousal rage at the 
credit card bills.  I'm inclined to suggest that, while spousal rage is a 
part of any restoration, Fisher's/Wakeman's law is based upon garden variety 
human impatience and the need on any lbc owner's part to drive the damn 
thing.  Everyone with me?  Fine.

My question is: When do you delcare that the restoration is finally done?  

Old Whitesides has been on the road for about two years now, after an 
extensive restoration via an "I don't want to talk about it" budget.  But 
the projects continue!!  I had to swap out a water pump early last summer 
(bad almost out of the box).  Same goes for the coil.  Then in July I took 
the windshield back off (a real treat) so I could install tonneau studs on 
the scuttle.  I put the OD tranny in about a month ago (THANKS, Brian).  
Now, members of my car guy support group and I have decided that the rear 
springs are in need of replacement.  What the heck, let's do the fronts too!  

What I mean to ask here is this: is this still "restoration" or is this now 
finally simply "upkeep?"  When does this transition occur?  This car has 
been on the road for about 24 months and I've been unable to stop messing 
with it.  WHEN WILL THIS HORROR END?????

Will someone draw a line for me?  Can I tell my family & friends that I 
completed the restoration in July of 1994 or will I complete it in June of 
1996?  What if we decide that I need new rear shocks?  What about that brake 
master cylander that acts a tick odd now and then?  Does Denise "I was no 
where near Lord Sprocket's place" Thorpe have some sort of incantation?  Is 
there an evil child somewhere, with a glassy stare and a model of my car, 
with pins stuck in the rear springs?

Will "I'm a sick man" Zehring

p.s. or is this really just another case of that dreaded affliction 
"Shipwright's disease" (the only cure for which is death)?

p.p.s.  or the reverse question: when does the intensity of "upkeep" reach a 
point that the effort becomes a "restoration?"


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