Hey Ardun Doug! how'd you know I had a cookout last nite?
-roasted finners ona 'xzaust pipe cookout
-actually da' dam Tractor mit plow,(16hp Briggs 1 lunger, 48' blade)
quit runnin' with its grille facin' the north wind comin' out across the
river a 1/2 mile away (the beginnings of the Susquahanna) at about 5pm....
a good wind chill guess? prolly -10. problem? alla sudden like no gas
to carb. cough, cough. (ain't that allas th' way???) Fix? back it into
the UNheated garage on full choke (just barely!) and tekit all apart ta
findout why.... Next step? Run to NAPA store, get new fuel filter (and a
sparkplug while I'm attit) drain gas tank to try to get rust particles
out, still won't run out worth a darn....hmmm, whyzatt? get flashlight,
look inside, an' find very big, very dead suicidal spider (no,not a
"pooorch" spyder)stuck in th' 1/4' fuel delivery tube..... Only I could
possibly have trouble like this thing gives me on a regular basis....good
thing I just bought one'a them really long forceps at the last outdoor NY
swap meet at Lebanon Valley Speedway on NOV. 2nd. -and this time its
trouble while I still had a 2 foot pile of snow out in the road, -in traffic
waiting for me and my tractor -kinda sounds like a new song title from
nashville now don't it? "ME AN' M' TRACTOR' la, la la .....
Anybody comes anywhere near me sayin' annythin' nice about snow is gonna
get it. I swear they're gonna get it. Ain't winter grand?
...sure envin' you lucky dawgs in warmer climes, "Dirty Doug"
Home of low temperatures, high taxes, hypocrites, an' now HILLARY!
What more could we ever ask for???
>From: ARDUNDOUG@aol.com
>Reply-To: ARDUNDOUG@aol.com
>To: land-speed@autox.team.net
>Subject: Fwd: weather?
>Date: Wed, 26 Jan 2000 20:35:29 EST
>
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>Return-path: Bpolistoon@aol.com
>From: Bpolistoon@aol.com
>Full-name: Bpolistoon
>Message-ID: <9.1516273.25c0d1a0@aol.com>
>Date: Wed, 26 Jan 2000 17:39:28 EST
>Subject: weather?
>MIME-Version: 1.0
>X-Mailer: AOL for Macintosh sub 147
>To: undisclosed-recipients:;
>
><< Official Upstate New York Temperature Conversion Chart
>
> 60 degrees
> Folks in New Jersey turn up their furnaces.
> People in Upstate New York plant gardens and go swimming.
>
> 50 to 59 degrees
> Californians shiver uncontrollably.
> People in Upstate New York sunbathe, trying hard not to get cloud
>burns.
>
> 40 to 49 degrees
> Most Italian & English cars won't start.
> People in Upstate New York drive with their windows down.
>
> 32 to 40 degrees
> Distilled water begins to freeze.
> Cayuga Lake's water gets a little thicker.
>
> 20 to 29 degrees
> Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves and woolly hats.
> People in Upstate New York throw on a flannel shirt when they go
>outside.
>
> 15 to 19 degrees
> Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
> People in Upstate New York have the last cook-out before it gets cold.
>
> Zero to 15 degrees - People in Miami all die...........Upstaters go to
> the drive-in for ice cream.
>
> Zero to 20 below
> Californians move south; Mexico declares an immigration crisis.
> People in Upstate New York get out their winter coats.
>
> 20 to 40 below
> Washington D.C. is abandoned by professional politicians; the Federal
> government grinds to a complete halt.
> Upstate NY Girl Scouts in are selling cookies door to door.
>
> 40 to 60 below
> Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.
> Upstate Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets
>cold
> enough.
>
> 60 to 80 below
> Chicagoans absolutely refuse to venture outdoors, even when out of
> kielbasa, making the city a virtual ghost town.
> People in Upstate NY swing by the store on their way home to rent some
> extra videos and get some cold Molson's and more milk.
>
> 80 to 100 below
> Santa Claus abandons the North Pole and moves operations to North
> Carolina for the balmy weather and non-union labor.
> Upstaters get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg of Genny they
> had stored in the basement.
>
> 100 to 297 below
> Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
> Cows in Upstate NY complain about farmers with cold hands.
>
> 297 to 460 below
> ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale).
> People in Upstate NY start greeting each other with...."Cold 'nuff for
>ya?"
>
> 500 below Zero
> Hell freezes over.
> The Buffalo Bills win the Super Bowl.
> >>
>
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