As an airline pilot I found this amusing. This actually explains a lot...
it will make your day.... Happy Friday!
A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of 'why' our country is in
trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle
seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.. (On
an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer (Howard
Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town. I started to explain the length of
the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with,
''I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in assachusetts
.''
Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is
in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa '' his response -- click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a
Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando
. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's
not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, 'Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin
state!'
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ''Is it
possible to see England from Canada?''
I said, ''No.''
She said, ''But they look so close on the map.''
5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if
he could rent a car in Dallas . I pulled up the reservation and noticed he
had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent
a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car
to drive between gates to save time.''
6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed
to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit
left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.
I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't
understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went
fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do airlines put
your physical description on your bag so they know
whose luggage belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?'
He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on
my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight I think that's very rude!''
After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying
laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT
- Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag
on his luggage.
8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip
package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, ''Would it
be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?''
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright from
Alabama who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?''
I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was told my
flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.''
10. Senator Dianne Feinstein called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola,
Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?''
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane.
She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''
11. Mary Landrieu , La. Senator called and had a question about the
documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion
about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. 'Oh, no I don't.
I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.''
I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa.. When I told her
this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times and every time they
have accepted my American Express!''
12. A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ''I
want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .''
I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the name
of the town?''
'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man.
After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've looked up
every airport code in the country and can't find a rhino anywhere."
''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check
your map!''
So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ''You
don't mean Buffalo , do you?''
The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it's in!
Could anyone be this DUMB?
YES, THEY WALK AMONG US
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