> Subject: Becoming an illegal alien.
>
> Becoming Illegal: (From a Maryland resident to his senator) > >
> The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
> Senate Office Building
> 309 Hart, Washington DC , 20510
>
> Dear Senator Sarbanes,
>
> As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
> Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted
> the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process
> for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
> My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen
> to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the
> Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's
> provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United
> States for
> five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine
> and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal
> when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone
> figures it out.
> Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay
> taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years
> of
> taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can
> apply
> to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me
> and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.
> Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local
> emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped
> paying
> premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save
> almost $10,000 a year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be
> that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her
> law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many
> colleges throughout the United States for my son.
> Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the
> burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car
> insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have
> college age children driving my car.
> If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become
> illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I
> would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
> Your Loyal Constituent,
>
> Pete McGlaughlin
>
> Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service
> 1-800-289-1040.
> Please pass this onto your friends so they can save on this great
> offer!!!!
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