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Rules For Collecting MG's

To: british-cars@autox.team.net
Subject: Rules For Collecting MG's
From: a064@amug.org (Jim Crosson)
Date: Sun, 26 Jun 1994 16:27:10 -0700
I am the Newsletter editor for the Arizona MG Club in Phoenix, AZ.  I would
like to use this digest to trade articles for monthly newsletters with anyone
that would like to contribute.  My club likes the Tech-Tip type of article
altho a good Lucas joke or auto cartoon woul be nice. ie. Why do the
British drink warm beer? - The use Lucas refrigerators.  I have already
noticed some good material in the week or so I have been on the net.- The
letter on Whitworth tools was most usefull.  My british car field is in the
spridget line.  I have owned 6 in the past 30 years. I currently have a 65
Sprite and a 66 Midget and a 64 parts car I picked up this last week. If you
have any questions in that line, send them to me.
It's been to hot to do much outside here this last week with the 117 degree
and all, so this will give me time to catch up on the reem of e-mall I have
aquired this week.


RULES FOR COLLECTING MGS 
by Roy and Bob Wiley 
Reprinted from MGB Driver 
via the British Mortorcar Club of Southern New Mexico
via The Arizona MG Club

This article was first written in regard to antique tractors by Roger Welch 
who lives out in Nebraska. However the similarity between collecting tractors 
and MGs was too good to miss so we borrowed his rules and changed a few words!

RULE l-Collect only one make and model of MG, nothing but early roadsters or 
rubber burnpered GTs for exarnple.When all your MGs are the sarne color and 
shape, it's harder if not impossible for anyone to figure out how many MGs you 
actually have.

RULE 2-Never line up your MGs, ever! Nothing distresses a difficult spouse 
more than seeing twelve old MGs lined up, looking for all the world like a 
pile of burning hundred dollar bills. Scatter the MGs around, a couple behind 
the garage, one or two in the garage, another beside the garage, maybe a 
couple at a friends house, so that it is not possible for anyone (if you know 
who I mean) to see more than two or three from any one perspective. Your hobby 
will be less 'irritating' that way.

RULE 3-For pretty much the same reason, don't number your MGs, give them 
names. You'd be surprised how much less trouble you will have if you talk 
about "Scarlet B" rather than GHN5-12345.

RULE 4-Early in your collecting, buy an MG you don't want. Then sell it as 
quickly as you can. Don't worry about making any money on the transaction, the 
main thing is to buy an MG and get rid of it. Then you can say, "Yes my sweet, 
I do have six MGs in the garage while our car is out in the weather. That 
doesn't mean I will always have six MGs. Remember the one I got rid of ? I'm 
thinking of selling another one any day now, so we can put our car in the 
garage. If you have a friend who collects MGs make arrangements for him to 
drop off an MG now and again. That way you can say, if anyone asks, that you 
bought it. Then have him haul it off again and say you sold it. With this 
system you establish your reputation for moderation.

RULE 5-Pay for your MGs with cashier's checks,or postal money orders, or cash 
which leaves far less evidence than checks drawn on the family account. Once 
you have gotten possession of another MG and paid for it, eat the stubs. 
carbon copes  or receipts immediately. Such things have a way of becoming an 
embarrassment later,  take it from me!

RULE 6-Now and then buy a wreck for 'parts' even if you don't need the parts. 
In fact you might consider hauling a wreck or two on the same trailer or 
truck, whenever you haul home a good MG. This is called 'liability averaging'. 
If your significant other says something about having enough money for yet 
another MG, but not enough for a new refrigerator, point indignantly to the 
MGs on the trailer-the beautifill one, solid and in running condition for 
which you paid $1,500.00 and the rusted hulks you got for $50.00 each. Then 
huff, "Snookums, I got those for little more than $500.00 each and the one in 
the back is easily worth $2,000.00. That s a tidy profit of $400.00." See7 
Doesn't that make you sound like an investment wizard?

RULE 7-When things get critical. consider dragging home an MG without 
transmission or rear wheels. If there's a complaint you say, "MG? What MG? 
That's not an MG! That's only a front end, not even close to an MG. Then a 
couple of weeks later bring home a rear end minus the radiator, engine and 
front wheels. "MG? What MG? That s no MG, that's only a rear end, not even 
close to an MG!" However, don t try this more than once every couple of years!

RULE 8-Have a dealer or friend call you now and then when you're not at home, 
and tell your spouse, "Bob told me to keep an eve on the MG going at the 
auction on Saturdavy but it sold for $5,000.00, and I know there s no way a 
financially cautious and responsible guy like Bob would pay that much, so I 
didn't even make a bid on it for him. Not only will this make you look real 
good. but the next time you buy an MG say something like, "Luvi-bear, this 
beauty only cost me S1,000.00, which means we are $4.000.00 ahead of where we 
d have been.,if I'd have gotten the one before. If I keep saving money like 
this, we'll be able to afford to go on that Caribbean cruise next winter." If 
you say it fast enough, it might just work!

RULE 9-If your mate insults vour work calling it "Rustoration", laugh a 
lighthed laugh, making it clear that MGs are not to you what shoes were to 
Imelda Marcos.

RULE l0-If your situation worsens to the point where vour mate asks, "Who do 
you love more, me or your MGs?" Whatever you do, don't ask for time to think 
it over!

I will sent anyone our club newsletter for any club newsletter sent to me.

In the Bond of the Marque,

Jim Crosson
638 N. Valencia Pl.
Chandler, AZ 85226 







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