Coup Flu Strikes the Glasnost Garage!
Ft. Mitchel Kentucky - 8/22/91
Keptin Comrade Dr. Bobwrench, the People's Leader of the Glasnost
Garage (Auto Service and Repairistroika) was nearly deposed late this
week in this northern Kentucky city.
Apparently weakened by the long and ardous journy from his Eau Claire,
Wisconsin winter retreat to this caucus of the Party Faithful, the Great Leader
and his loyal Comrade, Elizabeth were declared ill upon their arrival. The
exact nature of the illness was not disclosed, though it has been rumored to
have been caused by compressive stress.
Upon the arrival of the Central Committe, it was decided to perform
exploratory surgery upon the Great Supporter Elizabeth in order to better
motivate The People's Leader. A corrective approach was decided upon and a
5 Hour Plan begun. With the assistance of the Central Committe, Ministers of
Fat Chance, Deer Herd Managment, Very Fast Transportation, head of the
SLCFWSC, various members of the Party, and the assurances of the Saviours of
the People, John Swauger and Charles Runyan, the surgery was begun.
The removal of the Head for inspection was implemented as scheduled, and
required the use of innovative rope-in-the-cylinder techniques pioneered
by our revolutionary brothers in the West. But, once removed, the Head
promptly returned to life to wreak revenge taking a bite out of the
hand of our Beloved Doctor. Whilst the Damaged One was being attended to,
the Minister of Fat delivered the bad news. Piston # 4 has a chunk taken
out of the periphery all the way down to the ring. The 5 Hour Plan was in
ruin. Close inspection, however, revealed that the cylinder was not damaged
at all and that Reconstruction and Reform might be possible.
Thus the Revolution had begun. Where might Our Heros find a .030 over
TR-6 piston by morning. Communiques flashed to all points of the globe that
the FedEx truck had not yet departed from. But the valiant efforts were in
vain, there was not a +30 piston to be had on short notice. But one might be
had from the hands of the Great Innovator, Ted Shumaker on Saturday morning.
In close consultation with the Central Committe, it was decided to put
the trusted Comrade back together and race it as it was. The Committe worked
until late in the night to prepare for the challenge to be faced the
next day. There were many obstacles to be overcome in the struggle with
opression, but through dilligence they emerged ready to challenge the
Evil Ones.
(Ed: - I'm about ready to puke. I can only write this gook for so
long....)
The Next Installment: The Central Committee triumphs over the
Imperialist Wallinist
Opressor!
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