A big thanks to David Parker for excavating these for me. Good stuff for
those who weren't around for, or want a rehash of, the brutally long
off-season of '98... (it's long)
phil
From: "Kelly, Katie" <katiek@spss.com>
Date: Wed, 17 Jun 1998 16:33:57 -0500
Subject: RE: A better sunscreen
Sticky in Sunnyvale writies:
- ----------------
I'm getting really sick and tired of feeling sticky and gooey all
weekend
from most sunscreens I've tried. And M3's leather interior likes it even
less:-). What are the better non-greasy sunscreens on the market? Any
suggestions?
- ---------------
So glad you asked, Boris! Tired of feeling gooey myself (and attracting
dust and asphalt particles which stuck to my legs all day), I took my
problems to my local Clinique counter at Macy's. I said, "Look, don't
try to sell me any make up. I'm just sick of sticky sunscreen. And by
the way, do you have any tinted lip balm?"
Mitsy immediatly asked me some basic skin questions, like: Do you wash
your face, are you aware that if you don't use our products, you're face
will fall off, don't you feel like a freak shopping in here with your
naked facial skin exposed so we can all see your freckles and laugh
lines?
Then she filled in my answers into this little chart and came up with
the perfect tinted and UV protectent lip balm for me. I was expecting
glow in the dark lips, but surprise! I was actually quite satisfied with
the muted and natural looking color.
Then we moved on to the sunscreen. What I learned from Mitzi are there
are two kinds. I forgot exactly what they are, because all I wanted was
sunblock, not a lesson in hide tanning. Well, you might actually find
this interesting. The two kinds are called something like "chemical" and
"non-chemical." The chemical kinds actually absorb the sun light. They
are very easy to apply. However, they only last a short time and you
have to reapply often.
The non-chemical types take a little work to rub into the skin. It's
best to use freshly exfoliated skin. The term "exfoliate" is a very
large word which really means "to scrub clean." To demonstrate this,
Mitzi took a piece of scotch tape from the tape holder which she
actually had strung around her neck like a neckless. FrrrrEAK! She stuck
it on the top of my hand and removed. Ooooo! That's dead skin! Very
gross. She then applied a mild non-abrasive purply tinted chemical to
the area and said, "This works as well as an exfoliate." Apparently,
this chemical eats away at your dead skin, rendering it clean, shiny and
new.
Then she applied the non-chemical sunscreen to my hand. "Doesn't this
feel nice?" she said. Actually, it did. I could not tell the difference
between that and my fully naked exposed skin on the other hand. The
advantage of the non-chemical sunscreen is that it actually BLOCKS the
sun from ever reaching your skin, Mitzi says. It takes a little longer
to work onto the skin, but chances are, you can probably wear it all
day. "But don't forget to exfoliate that night, or it will stay there
forever!" she reminded me. How comforting.
Also, you really don't need to use too much of the stuff, which makes it
even less sticky.
A non-chemical sunscreen might be easier on your car's leather interior,
as well.
Or, you might try applying the sunscreen all over your car's leather
interior, just to even out the chemical (or "non-chemical") reaction.
Then again, I'm having a hard time understanding how the "non-chemicals"
in non-chemical sunscreens got the name "non-chemical." All the
ingredients still have long, hard to pronounce names if you ask me. It's
kind of freaky, what we put on our skin to protect it from this natural
star in the sky. At least I know what the sun does to me. What does this
stuff do that I can't see?
Oh well.
Any men reading this might want to go somewhere other than the Clinique
counter, as the employees there generally frown upon facial hair. But at
least you know a little bit more about sunscreen. Probably more than you
ever wanted to, I bet.
Katie Kelly
Technical Publications
SPSS Bay Area
(415)453-6700 ext.233
------------------------------
From: "Kelly, Katie" <katiek@spss.com>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 13:24:29 -0600
Subject: the Ace Report: Week 3 with no autocross.
Hello everyone out there in cyber land.
I was just wondering if anyone else noticed this. Have you noticed how much
money you save in the off season? It's only been a month, but I never
realized until now that I actually make a decent salary! I've got all this
extra money now, and I'm freakin' out because I don't know what to do with
it all!
So, I've started shopping a whole lot more.
And while I was shopping, and ladies, you might find this interesting, I was
introduced to the wonders of the Clinique counter. Like, two Saturdays ago,
some friends of mine, non-autocrossers all (freaks!) and I were shopping in
Berkeley, an excellent place to shop! Well, we were in this funky little
store with many wondrous deals to be had, and we discovered, under flashing
neon lights, the Clinique counter. They had a special free sale! Buy $16.50
worth of stuff, and you get even MORE free stuff!
We had found the Promised Land. And let me tell you something about
Clinique. The sales people LOVE to put stuff on your face, so it requires no
skill whatsoever. You just go up there, and you say, "Hello, I have no idea
how to put on make up. What do I do?"
And Daphne, or whatever her name is on the name tag, will say, "Oh, don't
worry about it. I'll show you!"
And I'm serious, that's exactly what happened when I finally met up with
destiny. I said, "Uh, oh, I can't put that on. I just had a big slab of
pizza. My fingers are covered in grease."
And Barbi said, "That's okay! Here, use this special non-abrasive chemical
grease remover on your fingers, and I'll put some of this on your face!"
They live for this stuff!
So, after our conquest, we went next door to this little coffee shop and
poured all of our new free loot on the table. "Wow! This one gives you a
sheer, matte finish!" exlaimed Bobbi.
"And this one brings your eye-lashes to their full potential!" gleamed Kari.
There were some women with really short hair and frown lines at a table next
to us, scoffing at these silly girls with their new purchases. Oh well,
that's their problem that they're so miserable.
Once, I was that miserable, too, when I didn't know the joys of exfoliation.
One can only hope something will get through to these poor women who have
yet to learn the purpose of womanhood, which I think is that you get to put
all this junk on your face.
If I'm learning anything during this hiatus, it's that I'm so glad I'm a
girl! I really pity you boys with your razor burns. May you too discover the
joys of a deep moisturizer.
Well, thus concludes week three of my journey into "normal" life. I hope
others are coping as well as I am!
If you can call this coping. Actually, I think I may be losing my mind.
Well, that's for another topic.
This is your friendly Ace Reporter, signing off.
Katie Kelly
Technical Publications
SPSS Bay Area
(510)412-2812
mailto:katiek@spss.com
- ----------------------------------------------------------------------
Guilt slows your metabolism.
From: "Kelly, Katie" <katiek@spss.com>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 14:25:58 -0600
Subject: RE: the Ace Report: Week 3 with no autocross.
Kit Wetzler writes...
>Heck, no!
>
>As a budding player in CSP, the off season is when I have time to play
>with the car... ends up being more expensive, because I realize just HOW
>MUCH I need a Tec-II, and just HOW NICE a quad throttle body setup would
>be, and GOSH, wouldn't saving 25lbs be great if I went to some pretty
>Recaro racing seats?... and, hm, I wonder how much power I'd get if I
>built a nice 4 into 1 header? or.. shocks, springs, adjustable spring
>perches, camber plates, delrin bushings, sway bars, stainless brake
>lines, a header, a test pipe, new plug wires, rebuilt the engine,
>lightened flywheel, heavy duty clutch, rain tires, dry tires, rain
>wheels, dry wheels... and boy, having a tow vehicle would be great...
Easy there, Kit! You're stressin' me out!
The good news is there's a Clinique for Men line. It might help you get a
grip.
Soon, you too will be enlightened.
Katie
From: Bret Dodson <bret@serv.net>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 14:48:35 -0800 (PST)
Subject: Re: Ace Report: Cosmetics, the offseason and Rallycross
On Thu, 3 Dec 1998, Kit Wetzler wrote:
>In the interest of preserving what little manhood I still have after
>buying a Miata, I usually use a metal file and 50 grit sandpaper to
>clean my skin. When I'm feeling lazy, a bit of hydrochloric acid works
>well, why keep dirty skin on, when you can just burn it off?
I too suffer from the dreaded "You drive a Miata? Oh... I had never
noticed how tidy a dresser you are..." syndrome. Add in the Nordstrom bag
filled with Clinique for Men products (complete with that darling free
carrying purse, i mean bag!) in the trunk and what is a guy to do?
My answer: Cease the practice of hygene maintenance immediately.
This gives the people I encounter at the Ballet, Opera, book groups,
foreign film club and plant store no doubt as to the level of my
manliness.
Have you ever noticed that most male Miata drivers are either
Hairdressers, Interior decorators, Ballet choreographers/dancers or
software/hardware engineers or some other sort of high tech compu-sort?
This makes me think that male B Stock drivers have to be the bravest, most
sure of who they are, guys in the racing community. And some of the best
looking and most stylishly dressed guys in the pits, I might add (not that
there's anything wrong with that!).
In search of a nice woman without a sense of smell...
Bret "I studied dance/choreography in college" Dodson
'96 Miata R (dark pink with perky white stripes!)
Sheattle, WA
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "Susan L. Collicott" <camel@serv.net>
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 16:19:29 -0800 (PST)
Subject: Re: Ace Report: Cosmetics, the offseason and Rallycross
On Thu, 3 Dec 1998, Bret Dodson wrote:
>I too suffer from the dreaded "You drive a Miata? Oh... I had never
>noticed how tidy a dresser you are..." syndrome. Add in the Nordstrom
>bag filled with Clinique for Men products (complete with that darling
>free carrying purse, i mean bag!) in the trunk and what is a guy to
>do?
Whereas it seems like all female Miata drivers in Seattle are blonde women
who have no driving skills and never get above 50 mph and can't shift
worth a damn.
Ok ok, so I'm blonde too, but c'mon! I have an *R package*! And I put
the top down, unlike all the other female drivers I see. They never have
their tops down. (What are they, chicken?! Go topless!) At least I've got
the roll bar to set me apart from certain other red Miata drivers in
town...
>Bret "I studied dance/choreography in college" Dodson
>'96 Miata R (dark pink with perky white stripes!)
>Sheattle, WA
Susan "I studied how to crush cans on my forehead in college"
'96 Miata R (zooming-by red with lots of dust)
Seattle, WA
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