While all of you enjoy your grits and other body parts soaked in lard, we in
our Commune shall enjoy a feast of granola and berries. The berries were picked
fresh yesterday in the East Meadow.
Oddly enough, while many of our brothers and sisters were out picking Christmas
crops in South Field, they were accosted by a most bizarre group of vegatable
rights activists. Where they came from, I don't know. They arrived by the truck
load. I was not on hand to witness this strange event; I was at our Christmas
Morning Ritual, where we typically dance and sing in the nude, accompanied by
flautists.
Apparently, this band of hooligans stole our crop! They said in the name of the
Goddess, stop ripping these live beings from the ground. Although they did not
seem violent, it was decided that it would be best to relinquish the crop, lest
even more lives be lost. Perhaps, while en route to hell where they belong,
these lost souls will become hungry, and they will eat their stolen bounty.
Perhaps this rich food will not be wasted after all, and they will enjoy the
fresh juices of Mother Earth's sweet nectar.
Unfortunately, without our crop, Christmas Dinner will not be that enjoyable.
One can only eat so much granola and berries without wanting to gag. Brother
Jeremiah says he thinks Dominoes will deliver. I requested pepperoni and
sausage and some amber ale to wash it all down. After all, it IS Christmas.
Happy Christmas,
Katie Kelly
Marin County, CA
/// unsubscribe/change address requests to majordomo@autox.team.net or try
/// http://www.team.net/mailman/listinfo
/// Partial archives at http://www.team.net/archive
|