May 30th: Just moved to Kansas City, Mo . Now
this is a city that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm
balmy
evenings. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park lying on a
blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.
June 14th: Really heating up. Got to 100 today.
Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an
air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day
like this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper.
June 30th: Had the backyard landscaped with
western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to
maintain.
No more mowing for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th: The temperature hasn't been below 100
all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? At least
it's kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat and humidity
is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th: Fell asleep by the pool. (Got 2nd
degree burns over 60% of my body.) Missed 2 days of work, what a dumb
thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in
a climate like this.
July 20th: I missed Jerry (our cat) sneaking into
the car when I left this morning. By the time I got to the hot car
for lunch, Jerry had swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and
exploded all over the $2,000 leather upholstery. I told the kids that
he ran away. The car now smells like Kibbles and SHITS. No more pets
in this heat.
July 25th: The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!!
And it's hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and
the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed
to order parts.
July 30th: Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. $1,500
in damn house payments and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever
come here?
Aug. 4th: It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed
today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down a little, but this
freaking humidity makes the house feel like it's about 90. Stupid
repairman pissed in my pool. I hate this stupid city.
Aug. 8th: If another wise ass cracks, "Hot enough for you today?", I'm
going to tear his throat out. Damn heat. By the time I get to work
the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell
like a dead cat!!
Aug. 9th: Tried to run some errands after work.Wore shorts, and sat on
the black leather seats in the ol' car. I thought my ass was on fire.
I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and
ass. Now my car smells like burnt ass and fried cat.
Aug. 10th: The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot
and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shit for 2 damn
months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week.
Doesn't it ever rain in this barren damn desert??
Water rationing will be next, so $1700 worth of cactus just might
dry up and blow into the damn pool. Even the cactus can't live in this
heat.
Aug. 14th: Welcome to HELL!!! Temperature got to 113 today. Forgot to
crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The
installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My
wife had to spend the $1500 house payment to bail me out of jail.
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