Hundreds evacuate! Chaos, Pandamonium Everywhere!
There was just this huge explosion across the street at Chevron in Point
Richmond, CA. I thought maybe someone had slammed the door shut, but no,
it's just one of those random explosions that happen from time to time. I
just ran to the front of the building to check out the scene. Right now, as
I type, less than a half-mile away, there are some huge black clouds and
flames, yes, FLAMES burning from the ground, but it is difficult to tell
from what sort of structures. One appears to be a chimney. These flames
appear to be about 50 feet in height. Hundreds of employees from either
Pixar or SPSS are manning their vehicles for escape as I type, including
local residents of Pt. Richmond, but not I. For I, as your friendly Ace
Reporter, must remain on the front, to bravely report to my readers what is
happening AT THIS EXACT MOMENT IN TIME.
Of course, I have been ordered to evacuate the building, but excuse me, are
you nuts? The freeway home is only immediately adjacent to the burning
refinery. I am staying right here with my computer where it is SAFE. Plus,
as the Ace Reporter, I have a job to do.
Sirens are blaring at a near intolerable volume, as tires squeal from
nervous drivers trying to find a way out. Yet your Ace Reporter remains
brave and strong, determined to report the whole truth, and nothing but.
One moment, please, as she goes to investigate any recent happenings on the
front.
She has just returned. There are now two columns of black clouds, both
seemingly fueled by flames that I erroneously reported at fifty feet in
height. They now appear to be close to 100 feet, but this could merely be an
exaggeration due to shock, nervousness, and fear on the part of your
friendly Ace Reporter.
Oddly enough, the only people who are still in the building are your
friendly Ace Reporter, and some QA Engineers from Russia. Coincidence? The
Ace Reporter thinks NOT.
One moment, as I check out the scene one more time.
The fires seem to be contained. In fact, a report from our office manager
explains that whatever has exploded has disappeared, and that these other
smaller fires were set in order to contain the larger one. All appears to be
quiet on the front, yet you should see the pandamonium in the streets. It's
safer indoors.
This is unfortunate, because had been a bigger chicken, I could be headed to
Macy's right now to see what's on sale at the Clinique counter.
But alas, I am a brave and hearty Ace Reporter.
It's just part of my job, I guess.
This is your friendly Ace Reporter, signing off.
Katie Kelly
Technical Publications
SPSS Bay Area
(510)412-2812
mailto:katiek@spss.com
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Guilt slows your metabolism.
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